A letter to my slighty more angsty (younger) self,

Dearest Kayl,

Where do I even begin? I guess by giving you the false hope that everything come together later on in your life and falls in place like you want it too. Now that we have that out of the way…

You are a train wreck, oh my goodness, yes you are. You are like what? 12? And you can’t be trusted to brush your hair everyday? On one hand, I don’t blame you, you do have slightly unmanageable hair. I get it, I do. But I am pretty sure Sandy Claws has been bringing you a hair brush in your stocking for like 57 years, you have at least 3 that I remember, do yourself a favor and brush it.

Also, I realize that Barka is your best friend at this point (and I am happy to report that she will continue being your BFF4L well into your 20s) but you should probably get out there and try to make human friends. Cause you hit 23 and you’re universally known as a crazy cat lady, even strangers can tell. It’s like you give off some weird vibe to people and they instantly know that you are crazy. Must be the hair that you still don’t brush…

Life is hard, its unbalanced and cold and cruel at times. And you, my dear, are a ticking time bomb just waiting to explode and cover everything you know with shards of your pain and anger, but let me tell you some of the happy things that you get to live through so you know it’s not all bad.

You fulfill your desire to write, the mere fact that you are reading this proves it. And guess what else, you will eventually work at a radio station and get air time. It however is all that it is cracked up to be. You get some B.A looking ink, finally cut off all your hair in a fit of excitement and find out that you do love short hair. You become a house owner at the ripe age of 23 (not to brag or anything, but that’s better than more people your age). Your high school sweetheart and yourself tie the knot in 2014. You finally fall into a career that’s well suited for you.

You still have no idea what you want to be when you grow up but you have a better idea of what it is now then you did in high school. Also, being a professional mermaid is a thing, just so you know.

I hate to inform you that girls will continue to be cruel for no other reason than they can be. It is easier to stick to yourself, but you should branch out. You will meet some great people in high school who end up being your friends for life (Like Mary? Yeah, ya stay close) and even through college you meet some people that are in your life for a reason. They won’t stay there forever, you need to cherish the time you have with them.

You will make bad choices, I hate to inform you, even at my age now I am an idiot. But those choices shape you into who you are. Continue to stick up for yourself, even if no one else likes you, your dog Remus will and he is the greatest. You will work terrible jobs that make you hate everything even more, you will get to the point where everything makes you angry and you feel like you just can’t get ahead, and in all honesty, that’s exactly what happens. You can’t get ahead, and it’s okay.

At the end of your no good-terribly-bad days, just curl up with your fur-bies and read one of your serial killer books and think about how you’ll make it.

-An older, slightly less angsty Kayl

6 thoughts on “A letter to my slighty more angsty (younger) self,

  1. Proper stalking your blog right back and before my battery give up just wanted to say how awesome it is! I will continue my reading tomorrow. Love this post though especially as one of my dog is snoring on my feet as my cat is wrestling with the rug! I too have worked terrible jobs that I hate and still haven’t found my reason for being here. Great blog. Cannot wait to read more.

    Liked by 1 person

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